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Monday, September 29, 2008

Late Night with gnana

"i dont know what jingoistic and xenophobic mean (am looking up) i am just common folk. i just think our country has gone back to king and queen crap. taxation without representation. rich gettin richer off backs of serfs. we have no say in what happens in washington nor where and when we go to war. i am not an old lady headed to the hills with her guns and compound, but sure dont feel anyone listens. i am almost happy i willnot live to see the downfall of our county. because younger people do not know what it was like to be so proud to be an america. so they will accept the status quo. i still am proud i am american."

This comment has been haunting me. In the last years, I've remarked that I was glad the old people didn't have to see what's happened. And lately I've begun a serious exit strategy for the possibility should McSame get to be President.

This blog often catches my attention when something that's serious and negative makes some new move in my life. This is sometimes just my rant page. But more often than not, it's not a place you're gonna read something that'll send you on your way whistling "Zippadee doo dah". Over the last 10 years I've watched a lot of bad happen in my country. I'm accustomed, tuned, to look for the lies, the evil actions. Sometimes I get a fact wrong. Sometimes my opinion bleeds into what I'm reporting as a citizen journalist (my greatest achievement? #1 most-read article on, "Naked PETA Girls Attract Crowd in Brattleboro"). I try to stay away from emoting when reporting things. But here, I get to vomit.

To hear such disheartenment from one of my town's most lovely elders makes me puke. To see and know how evil and awful these leaders are makes me puke. I don't know how this will end, or if it will. And I have hopes on a guy who may or may not be the new leader we need. In paranoid moments I half-envision a Totalitarian Amerika, one in which I won't live under any circumstances. I wonder how much of my family will be Good Amerikans and be all right. My brothers are vets and getting up there so they're probably okay. It's the young ones- the 4 nephews and their families- that worry me most. Especially those that are already on the Right wing side. Will they be wearing a uniform under some new Fascist Regime, a new Fuhrer to horrify the world from my own country? And what if I do expatriate in another place, will I be interned there? Will the world hate the US the way it hated Nazi Germany?

Yet, the most bizarre set up has happened that may change my life anyway. It's possible that I may be able to emigrate with an amount of comfort- and birthright I wasn't aware of until 3 years ago. We live in very interesting times. I'm staying afloat thru it, and gods know my lot in life may change rapidly for the better, but part of me is with gnana. This is like watching the death of my country before my eyes. I'm looking at a younger-than-me black doctor to save the patient.

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