Saturday, September 15, 2012

Emo Beest

Apparently last night was a defining moment in the life of Hildebeest. I was sitting here. She was off to one of her seven other perches. Outta nowhere comes this huge catscream followed by much spitting and growls. I head to the bathroom, where she's in the window, behind the venetian blinds. All that shows is her long tortietail, which is blown up to three times its regular size. I pull back the blind and put a hand on her back and she screams twice and runs out to the hall, where she spazzes and slides into the bedroom in a paralytic freakout. I have no idea what happened. There was nothing out there when I looked, and no sign of anything having been there. She'd shed a nail but there wasn't even a pull in the screen. Who knows.

She hasn't been the same since.

She's a moping teenager. She slept almost all day, her head hanging dramatically upside down off the davenport, with the distinct aura of hopelessness. She ate her turkey with a certain resigned suffering. I tried playing the ball-on-a-string on-a-pole with her, her favorite toy, and she just looked deeply over her shoulder and looked away. I swear she did a head-sweep. None of my efforts to snap her out of it have worked. She'll tolerate something for a moment, then get up and slowly lope away, a sigh expressed in motion. It's the emo of a teenager. High cat drama.

It'd be nice to know, but I never will, what the hell happened in that window last night. Perhaps she faced a doppelganger, or her own mortality, or both. Maybe she realized this was all life is. Or that she'll never have that gray tabby she left in the Maine shelter. I dunno. Something existential went on.

6 comments:

Geo. said...

Maybe something existential. I don't know. I don't even know why I scream in the bathroom. I don't wear glasses in there anymore, that's for sure. I think your cat saw the future!

Elephant's Child said...

Toilet brush tail is a sure sign of disaster. Perhaps she shrieked too soon, and is now blaming you for her humiliation (because you saw her less than dignified response). Some days I would really like to know what goes on in a cat's head. Mostly I am glad I don't.

Anonymous said...

Maybe she suddenly realized that the world outside the bathroom window was real and not just a TV set for her to watch. The fact that she is a prisoner for life may have just set in. Seriously, it could have been a scent in the air that set her off...was the window open?

Austan said...

Geo.- there seems a veritable epidemic of screaming in the bathroom, but she was nowhere near a mirror. She may have stared into the maws of Hell for all I know. She's not talking.

Austan said...

EC- I'm thinking it would do no good for our wellbeings to know what the cat thinks. They may be plotting our deaths for all we know.

Austan said...

Lawless- yeah, the window was open with just the screen. Who knows what sets these strange furfaces off? She's been sleeping all day today, too, except for when she pestered me for food. She's a little weirdo, but she's my little weirdo. ;)