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Monday, January 7, 2013

Unreal Reality

I finally reached Billy. Mac's family have made the arrangements and handed him the bills.What they've decided is what they say Mac requested, but nothing of what she told me she wanted. It doesn't really matter now. The only thing that would help my brother is to bring her back and that's impossible.

God knows we've fought over the years, even went almost 2 years without speaking once. But I love my brother and it's a helpless, angering thing to have him go thru this. None of our other brothers are alive to call and give support. I've been in his shoes and it's shit.

There will be a one-night wake and no funeral. Cremation next morning. That'll be $10,000, please.

I pray he'll be okay.


Anonymous said...

This is exactly why we have prearranged and paid for everything. It was hard to part with the cash but it will simplify things later.
Poor man....he's going to need your support for a while to get through this. I'll be keeping both of you in my thoughts.

Starting Over, Accepting Changes - Maybe said...

I went to a funeral of a friend last Friday. Although it was expected as she had lung cancer and was in hospice, her husband was unconsolable. It was heartbreaking.

Your brother is fortunate to have a sister with a kind heart like you. I know you will give him comfort in the difficult months ahead.

Austan said...

Lawless- that's wise. Strider is in charge of mine, and whatever party she throws or whatever she feels up to, is fine by me. What gets me is that Mac and I had talked about these things every time someone died, and plenty besides, and I know what she said.

Whatever. Billy is all I care about now, and I'd go thru everything I've been thru a hundred times rather than have him go thru this now.

Austan said...

Arleen, I'm sorry you've lost a friend. whether expected or not it's horrible. I'm sad for your friend's widower, and yes, it's heartbreaking.

I'll do whatever I can for him. We're all we have left. I spoke with all my other brothers' widows today and we're getting the wagons in a circle. We'll get thru this.

And thank you all for being here for me.

The Elephant's Child said...

Its the helplessness which hurts. For so many things I am/you are fixit woman. And then something like this which can't be fixed comes along...
I am hurting for you and Billy both. Dreadful for both of you.

Austan said...

EC- that's the truth. What to do when we can't fix it? I'll fight for or against anything. You can't fight death when it comes.

It gives me a lot of comfort to know you care. Now I can take that and pass it to Billy. Maybe we can fight death after all.

Geo. said...

This is a calamity and I wish you courage and strength.

Austan said...

Thank you, Geo. I think your wishes were granted. x