16 Years Gone

On this day in 1995, I was in my NYC living room talking with my friend JP about opening a coffee shop -a store had become vacant and I'd finally left The Magickal Childe for good. JP Schneider is one of nature's finest creatures. We were making lists and talking dollars when the phone rang. It was my friend Mark, who lived up here near Ian, and he told me Ian was dead. That I was now The Young Widow Austan. I remember sinking to the floor in that crappy tenement kitchen, not believing it. Ian was strong; had just done a demanding starring role in "I Hate Hamlet". I'd only talked to him the day before. He was blaming a local restaurant for giving him agita. He was only 36; he was still vital and beautiful; we weren't done!

Why do people die in the middle of the story? It so sucks. So. Sucks enough to drive you crazy.

Anyway, all kinds of complications ensued and when we finally had the memorial I got up and gave an impassioned and from-the-gut eulogy, and quoted the song he often sang in my ear when we danced to no music, "If the sun refused to shine, I would still be loving you; if mountains crumble to the sea, there will stilll be you and me..."
"Thank You" by who else:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MKmQlPzf5YY

I really miss you the most. Hope you're having fun, Boobah.